Alabama
Would love to say Alabama but I’m thinking Michigan or Texas would beat us in a heartbeat. Hey, worst case I just go live in the woods and wait for it all to pass over.

Alaska
It’s so cold and far away no one would bother attacking them.
– Um, Hawaii is in the middle of an Ocean. We’d just sell you back to Russia.

Arizona
Texans may have more swagger. But, Arizonans have more crazy.

Arkansas
Runner-up. They own Walmart.

California
It would be California vs Texas. Kind of like north vs south. Texas would dredge up a good militia. Then, suddenly, come the redneck-annihilating iPad drones from silicone valley. Apple logos shooting death rays and IT guys making lazer beams out of the combined power of Linux for business servers.

Colorado
Colorado would just be like, “peace, you guys.”

Connecticut
Connecticut, because we have the element of surprise. Nobody would ever expect a thing.

Delaware
The biggest underdog: Delaware. They could just idly stand by while the other 49 states forget Delaware exists and destroy each other.

Florida
Does no one remember the flesh eating Florida zombie? Unleash that on Texas. Also, half of NY has relatives in Florida, so I guess we’d all be nagged by our grandparents to come and help defend the place.

Georgia
Georgia would win for one simple reason. We have the CDC so bio engineered attacks while they inoculate the locals.
Idaho
Create an impenetrable fortress of potatoes.

Illinois
We have the murder capitol. Good luck on your trip through the South Side of Chicago.

Indiana
We have lots of corn and medical research facilities. If anyone had the technology to make corn monster soldiers, it would be Indiana.

Iowa
We have so much corn… Yeah that’s about it. twiddles thumbs hastily googles good Iowa things Crap.

Kansas
Wheat isn’t much of a fighting force.

Kentucky
Kentucky and Colorado have our chemical weapons reserves. There’s enough serin in there to kill half the country. I think we would have a pretty good chance. We have rednecks with guns and hunting bows, too.

Louisiana
We wouldn’t have the funds to even join the war.

Maine
They have the smallest border to defend, and are an unattractive target because of the need to invade several states just to reach its border. They would just have to wait for the other states to blow each other up, and then quickly march through the relatively small states near it’s border, then take everyone by surprise. At the beginning stages, they could take New Hampshire early and store their troops there, giving them an advantageous defensive position while leaving open the option of attacking Vermont or Massachusetts should either of them get complacent and leave too few troops at home.

Maryland
As a Marylander, I would have to say that Maryland would be the underdog in the war that comes out victorious.
We surround DC on 3 sides, so since they aren’t in this war we could easily take it over, along with all the weaponry and anti-aircraft systems that come with it that protect our government.
Massachusetts
They’ve been leading the fight since before we were a country.

Michigan
We’re surrounded by water on three times and have lakers to defend the lakes. Gun ownership is 245 percent. We could also hide in the U.P. and wage guerrilla warfare.

Minnesota
Many say Alaska is cold, but oftentimes Minnesota is colder. Plus Minnesota is as gun crazy as any southern state. The ony real competition is michigan. I believe Minnesota also has missile silos.

Mississippi
Is surrender an option?

Missouri
The only state with both a nuclear weapons plant and nuclear weapons site, also has whiteman airforce base where the stealth bombers are stored.

Montana
Montana would kick ass, take names and still be home for dinner. My reasoning behind this would be:
1) We may only number at 1.2 million, but 1.1 million have guns.
2) Nukes for days here.
3) We have one of the largest cattle populations in the country.
4) We are also one of the healthier states (by that i mean we have one of the lowest obesity rate)
5) The states that were main threats would probably enter through the East and bout half way to anything important, probably kill yourselves from boredom.

Nebraska
They would bore everyone to death.
Nevada
Area 51 and nellis air force base. Enough said.

New Hampshire
I’m thinking New Hampshire has the biggest commitment (Live Free or Die).

New Jersey
Don’t know who would win, but I’m pretty sure that New Jersey started it.

New Mexico
Just because no one is mentioning us yet, and we have nukes.

New York
New York would have a tremendous amount of International support due to its impact on the global economy. maybe they wouldn’t “win” , but you couldn’t take over New York.

North Carolina
I think North Carolina would have a chance. The Outer Banks would be good for hiding the Navy, and would be easy to defend because there are limited access points. We have guns and wack jobs. We have Cheerwine, and Pepsi. We have more pigs for food than we do people. We have a several major military bases. We have a decommissioned Battleship, which if the movie “Battleship” had any accuracy haha, we could turn into a functioning ship. We have a dense road network. Three top notch universities to continue research and log records. I see NC as having a very good chance.

Together North and South Dakota would merge into the Ultra Dakota. Once we collaborate there will be no stopping the redneck rampage of pick ups, shotguns and booze.

Ohio
Not Ohio, that’s for sure. The weather would slow down invaders long enough for me to go hide in the woods… so there’s that…

Oklahoma
We’re done for unless we join with Texas. But that will never happen. So we’re done for.

Oregon
Oregon wouldn’t fight, we would go snowboarding and pick berries.

Pennsylvania
We have the Amish Mafia.

Rhode Island
It’d be a standoff between Rhode Island and Delaware. No one would bother fighting them so they would obviously be the only two left after everyone else annihilated each other.

South Carolina
We started the last one. We’ll stay out of it this time…

Tennessee
Not Tennessee. Touching 8 other states means we’d get destroyed right at the start….
“Texas.”
-Texas

Utah
They’d outbreed everyone else.

Vermont
Spread out population in towns. Half owning at least one gun. And Ben and Jerry’s.

Virginia
Surprised no one has said Virginia. We have 16 military bases just in one area of the state. We have navy seals, submarines, aircraft carriers, f-22 raptors, army coast guard etc etc etc.

Washington
We would ally with Oregon.

West Virginia
West Virginia might not win but we would guerilla warfare the hell out of everyone that tried to occupy us.

Wisconsin
Canada will just mistake us for one of them and come to our aid.

Wyoming
No one ever suspects Wyoming.

Source: thefederalistpapers

Source: reddit